Transcript: Why Effective Leaders Prioritize Self-Awareness // Doug Waldo, Best Christian Workplaces Institute

The Flourishing Culture Podcast Series

Why Effective Leaders Prioritize Self-Awareness
May 30, 2022
Doug Waldo

Intro: Is your leadership effectiveness limited because of your blind spots? Do you agree with the quote, “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves”? Well, today we talk about practical tools to improve our self-awareness so that we can be even more-effective leaders.

Al Lopus: Hi, I'm Al Lopus, and you're listening to the Flourishing Culture Podcast, where we help you create a flourishing workplace. The problem employers are facing today is that more of our employees are quitting than ever before. Some people are calling this the great resignation. And now with millions of open jobs, how can churches, Christian non-profits, and Christian-owned businesses face this tidal wave of resignations while attracting new, outstanding talent? And we know that having a flourishing workplace with fully engaged employees is the solution. I'll be your guide today as we talk with a thought leader about key steps that you can take to create a flourishing workplace culture.

So, now let's meet today's special guest.

As a leader, you invest time and energy into your team, into leading other people. But in order to lead others effectively, you also need to be growing yourself. Do you understand the impact that you have on those around you? How do you grow in self-awareness? And on today's podcast, we're going to address self-awareness as a key to self-leadership. You'll gain a deeper understanding of the importance of self-awareness and, also, some practical steps to implement as you grow in this essential leadership practice.

I'm delighted to welcome Doug Waldo, who serves as a senior consultant with the Best Christian Workplaces Institute. Doug has a rich background in human resources and leadership development, and he has a deep understanding of the research behind practices in this sphere.

Doug, glad to have you on the Flourishing Culture Podcast. Welcome.

Doug Waldo: Thanks, Al. It’s a pleasure to join you.

Al: Well, Doug, why is self-awareness important for a Christian leader? I mean, it can sound kind of selfish, doesn't it?, to focus on our own growth when we're responsible for helping others grow. But how do you frame the foundation of self-awareness and its importance in the growth as leaders?

Doug: It can sound selfish, I suppose, but it definitely is important for a leader to begin with self-awareness and then model that behavior for those around them. I was on a flight last week, and we're all familiar, of course, with the preflight safety talk. You know, in the unlikely event of a loss of cabin pressure, adults should put on the oxygen mask first and then help children to put their masks on. The implication here is that before the adult can help a child, they have to be in a safe position themselves. If the adult is struggling to breathe, not only are they in jeopardy, but anyone they might help is also in jeopardy. The same is true with self-awareness and leadership. Before a leader can invest in someone else's growth, they must be in a position of growth themselves.

I remember years ago, when I was just entering the practice of organizational development, and a colleague told me, “Doug, always remember that without awareness there is no growth,” and that stuck with me. And I believe it's more true today than ever. If leadership is primarily about exerting influence, and if we aim to grow that influence, then we have to grow in our awareness.

Al, you mentioned framing this for a Christian leader, and whether that's leading a church, school, ministry, or whatever, I immediately think of this in the context of stewardship. As we exercise influence, the leader, in many ways, is a steward of human resources, and those resources have been handcrafted by God for a specific purpose. And we see this echoed in Ephesians 2:10, sort of been my life-work verse, if you will. But we are God's handiwork created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Some translations say God's workmanship or His masterpiece. It indicates it points to a very special, intentional, or very purposefully equipping of the Christian for service in the Kingdom. As a leader, if I'm to recognize and steward that handiwork in others, which is what we do in shepherding a flock, we first need to apply that in our own lives, recognizing how God has handcrafted us uniquely, invest in developing those gifts, and then faithfully serve with those gifts, because according to that verse, God has prepared works for us to do. It's intentional, and I think that's pretty amazing.

You know, in elsewhere in scripture, besides in Ephesians, we are told to examine ourselves, to test ourselves—

Al: Right.

Doug: —to keep a close watch on ourselves. We're told not to think too highly of ourselves. And we see this notion of asking God to prove us, to try us, to test us, continually. So the importance of self-awareness is supported by Scripture, and it tends to be within that context of growing in our faith and in our service within the Kingdom. We're also told to know the condition of the flock.

Al: Mm-hmm.

Doug: So I would frame the conversation around exercising the best stewardship of what God has given us, realizing the intentionality with which He has equipped us. And that gets to the heart of self-awareness for a Christian leader.

Al: Yeah, right, Doug. And I know you've worked a lot with leaders and self-awareness, but that's really a great foundation. And once we understand that God handcrafted us for a purpose, as you outlined, you know, how do we practically, then, move forward in our own self-awareness? What steps are there on the road to growth in this area?

Doug: I think the best first step is to acknowledge the words of Psalm 139. You know, in the first verse there, we see that God searches us and knows everything there is to know about us. The Psalm goes on to affirm that nothing is hidden from God. Even the days that have not happened yet, God knows them all. And in response, David's saying that such knowledge is just too wonderful for him. He can't attain it. And he concludes the Psalm in the same way that he began. In this case, he's asking God to search him, to know him, and to lead him. And with that foundation, I think, moving forward and self-awareness, we have to acknowledge our own limitation to be self-aware in the first place. Elsewhere in Scripture it says the heart is deceitful. So it can be very difficult, if not impossible, for us to search and know ourselves. We need help. And studies show that roughly 10 to 15% of leaders can be classified as self-aware. That's it. So that means 85 to 90% of us in leadership are not that self-aware. So for the Christian leader, we need to seek discernment and the Holy Spirit’s leading in that regard. Self-awareness should be addressed, at least in part, as part of our prayer and devotional practices, asking for the same searching and knowing and leading that David asked for in the Psalm.

Now, in terms of a vocation, we have to take time to specifically think through our goals and what those say about our values. We need to wrestle with past failures and future doubts, and really consider how those shape our assumptions and our expectations for the future. We need to understand how those factors shape how we operate within our spheres of influence as leaders. And this can be tough stuff. Often, we just don't see it. We certainly don't see it like God does, something that David marvels at in the Psalm. And I think we should marvel at it, too.

You know, not that long ago, maybe the last ten years or so, research by a biological anthropologist named Dr. Helen Fisher has revealed that there are certain neurochemical systems that work behind how we lead. These neurochemical systems actually shape our leadership styles. And they found this using functional MRI studies, where they could actually see patterns of these chemicals, like dopamine and serotonin and so on. How they were expressed, in part, shaped how the person led, their leadership style. And these were operating behind the scenes. But knowing this helps us to understand our preferences and tendencies and where they may come from while helping us to better understand opportunities for growth.

So for the first time, just in our generation, we can now see at least some of what lies behind a leadership style from a physiological standpoint. This is amazing stuff, and we should be marveling at that. They have huge implications for self-leadership and leadership in general.

Next, I think we need the support of an external perspective, such as the feedback from those around us, those who know us best. They see our strengths and our weaknesses on display, and we need their perspective to get an accurate, or at least a more complete, understanding of who we are and how we use the gifts that God has handcrafted in us. With 360-degree feedback studies, we have found that although there tends to be a positive correlation between a person's view of their leadership and how others view them, the correlation is actually quite small. Generally, there's more disagreement than agreement when it comes to external perspectives of our leadership. Our superiors see something differently than we do, our direct report sees something differently than our superiors do, and our peers see something different entirely. All the same set of circumstances. So it's important to understand that these internal perspectives shape how people view and respond to our leadership. We have to be more self-aware about that.

So I use this analogy a lot. Have you seen the movie National Treasure with Nicolas Cage?

Al: Oh, yeah. That's a favorite. Yeah.

Doug: It came out 15, 20 years ago or so. So there's this trio, for those who haven't seen it, there's a trio of treasure hunters, and they're searching for this massive treasure hidden somewhere in the U.S. And for most of the movie, they're trying to find and decipher these various clues as to where the treasure is hidden.

Al: Yeah.

Doug: So there's a significant moment in the movie where they discover that there are major clues to the treasure’s location written in invisible ink on the back of the Declaration of Independence. So besides the obvious challenge of getting their hands on that document—which that's a great scene, too—once they have it, they need a special pair of spectacles, or glasses, that will allow them to read the invisible ink.

Al: Yeah.

Doug: So these glasses were supposedly invented by Benjamin Franklin. And they have two lenses, like all glasses do, but then they have two additional lenses, and those lenses can pivot into place, into and out of place, and those two additional lenses are colored differently. So they allow the treasure hunters to view clues on the back of the document that the other lenses could not reveal.

So here's the point: all the lenses were essential. They all revealed important clues that were otherwise invisible, without which there is no access to the treasure. I mean, having three of the four lenses was really no more helpful than having just one. To find the treasure, they needed all four perspectives, if you will.

So I see the road to growth much in the same way. We need multiple perspectives, multiple data points from different lenses to truly unlock our hidden potential in leadership. If we go it alone with our limited, biased perspective, there's just no feasible route to the treasure.

Al: Gosh, I love that, Doug. And I was just reflecting on some leaders don't really want to get feedback, but yeah, it takes multiple lenses. I love that analogy to really, you know, get the kind of feedback that we need to know how we're impacting others.

You know, usually you're working with senior leaders, and we all work with senior leaders to help them be more self-aware. How does this play out throughout an organization? You know, what are the implications for organizational culture where leaders are growing in self-awareness and self-leadership?

Doug: I guess I'd build on the earlier point. That is, what if an entire team or organization held the view that there was a very intentional design in each person, that God himself had handcrafted each leader and each employee for His purposes, and our role as leaders was to steward those resources because there are specific works that God had planned for those under our care? How would that team or organization be different? Should it be led differently? And I would say our approach to everything from recruiting to retention would be very purposeful. I mean, we are talking about God’s treasure here. We would see an organization focused on making sure that outstanding talent was cultivated and that fantastic teams were the norm. After all, anything less than that would be like leaving treasure behind or unaccounted for. You just wouldn't do that. It's too valuable. But this is not the current state in most organizations today, for far too many individuals and teams are viewed in some way like moving parts to be managed or problems to be solved or chaos to be controlled. But for the self-aware leader who recognizes their role as stewards of God's craftsmanship, there's a heightened sense of expectation and of obligation to nurture that.

Can I share a quick story?

Al: Yeah, please. Yeah.

Doug: All right. So years ago, I was consulting for a large teaching hospital, and within that hospital was a medical-research division. They had an over 200 people working in that division, and nearly all were scientists and specialists, most with MDs, Ph.D.s, or both. And these are absolutely brilliant people. Well, a new senior leader had recently been brought in. He was charged with improving output, in this case, discovering new medical techniques and devices and treatments more cost effectively and more quickly. And this, of course, would gain acclaim for the hospital and more funding.

Al: Yeah.

Doug: As challenging as this would be already, the division was funded largely by research grants, which were highly competitive. So there was always this overwhelming sense of urgency to win the next grant. And so ultimately it produced an outcome that satisfied the funding source, which would, of course, lead to more funding. Early on, the senior leader noticed that not only were they competing with those other research hospitals for grants, but they were competing internally, quite aggressively, in fact. In other words, a culture had been put in place such that the team leaders competed with each other to win the bigger grant, to have the larger budget, the newest and best equipment, and to report stronger progress. The more he looked into it, the more he saw that the internal competition meant that teams weren't sharing information with each other, either out of habit or intentionally, because of that competitive motivation.

So the first thing we did when I engaged with him was to start with self-awareness. We went through a leadership-style survey together and explored the why and how of each of those team leaders’ own unique styles. And we found that most team leaders had a very directive, authoritative style. We called it a driver style. In essence, the competitive environment was a natural fit for the drivers’ approach, their need to win. There was urgency in their style and also a heavy emphasis on task focused rather than people focused. And that's not a bad thing, necessarily. I mean, the driver will get stuff done, that's for sure, and that's what the division needed, at least in part. But there are implications for that.

So we then moved into gathering multi-reader feedback via 360, and we asked teams to rate various aspects of the leadership. And what we found was not at all surprising. The competitiveness was creating a lack of collaboration and sharing across teams. And as we have seen many times elsewhere, the teams became silos. Even more concerning, within those silos, team leaders were not recognizing or stewarding the different styles of their own team members. Essentially, the leaders were trying to clone their own approach and were missing out on those multiple lenses through which we would find clues to the treasure that each person might bring to their team.

So after some training on self-leadership and communication styles within the teams, the division committed to coaching the team leaders on seeking what we called a collaborative advantage. And ultimately, we showed the leaders that their true competition was not their fellow teams within the hospital. They were all part of the same larger team, the same hospital system. And although they were competing against other research hospitals for grant funding and the top talent, that's for sure, but their true competition was really the major diseases and injuries that they were trying to heal through their research. And the ultimate objective was to treat a medical condition or disease rather than to win the next grant, although gaining a grant was certainly a part of that.

After several months of working to improve the culture, the senior leader said, “You know, we have some of the most highly educated and brightest people on the planet working here. And yet, in all that education, we have not been taught how to talk to our neighbor down the hall. And if we can get this right, this teamwork thing, it will help us come up with discoveries faster.” He made the connection between self-leadership, self-awareness, and their ultimate goal as an organization.

So clearly, self-awareness matters. And when leaders model and cascade that through an organization, great things can happen.

Al: I love your story, there, with this hospital. Start with a style survey, understand people's styles, and then a 360 really helped to understand what was going on with the competitiveness between teams, and, then, being able to then address it by changing the perspective of, you know, who are we really competing against? Is it our fellow teams? Is it other grants? But it's really about the disease and how that really brought teamwork together.

Well, you know, there's many different assessment tools that are out there and available. You know, there's free tools on the Internet. There’s even more comprehensive systems. And you've even developed and designed some yourself. But as you've been doing research and working in this field for many years, what do you advise people to use when they want to get accurate feedback and grow in their own self-awareness?

Doug: Yeah. If you do a quick search on the Internet, you will find a plethora of options, from free “tests” and quizzes—and I say “tests” in air quotes as if there's a right or wrong answer to any of this stuff. But for many of these, you can be labeled as a cheetah or a turtle, or I've seen hound dog. You can be assigned a number or a color, and whatever label they use, they supposedly describe you as a person. And those can vary from downright silly to some appearing horoscope-like. And some of the surveys out there can be interesting, I guess, and some may even have a purpose. In our work, though, we serve organizations, and so we're almost always working in employment context. So we really need to leverage tools that meet certain professional standards in industrial and organizational psychology, and those standards have to do with validity and reliability and fairness. And that's especially true in high-stakes’ applications, like hiring and succession planning, those types of things.

So first, in light of all that, I always advise people to get professional support to help them choose the best tool for their needs. This is not the best use of Google, necessarily. And I found there was helpful information to encourage self-awareness specifically comes from those tools that are designed to measure how we lead, what’s behind our leadership. It may be interesting to talk about our style in abstract terms like cheetah, turtle, three, or blue or whatever, and those can be fun conversations at times. But what's most important is that we get at the underlying factors that shape our leadership style.

And since about the 1940s, going way back to the Ohio State and Michigan studies, we’ve known that there are two primary underlying factors that explain about 85% of all the variance in how a leader leads. And these are how we relate to others and how we achieve tasks. Recognizing how we relate to others—that is, how we express our emotions in the interpersonal interactions in the workplace—that's a core aspect of self-leadership because it affects everything from how we engage in conversation, as we saw in the hospital case, to how we celebrate success or support each other in challenging times. So we refer to this as our relating style.

The other factor, the other part of that 85%, we call our achieving style, and this describes how we get work done. That is, do we approach work more methodically with an eye for efficiency and systems and processes, or do we approach work more urgently, willing to accept more uncertainty, ambiguity, and a lack of structure? And when we put those two factors together, we see unique leadership styles emerge. So we describe this as a leaders reach. We take the R-E, of relating style, and the A-C-H, of achieving style, and we form the acronym REACH. And in my experience, having this sort of objective external lens is essential in establishing and growing self-awareness.

And while each of us tends to prefer a particular style, we know from both research and practice that no one style is preferred. In fact, there’s an abundance of research emerging now, but it's also evolved over the last decade, suggesting that the most effective leader is one who has the agility to adopt multiple styles, and they operate on a continuum of styles rather than just one particular style where they stay. Doing that skillfully requires coaching and training. But it all begins with self-awareness. That is, what style of influence is my go-to style? Where and how is that style ideal, and where and how should I adapt to other styles? And we can't do that without some self-awareness.

Al: Right.

Doug: I read just last week an article where the author mentioned that given the dynamic nature of today's workplace and the increasing reliance on collaboration to get things done, self-awareness was a foundational skill for the 21st century, and I agree. So having some notion of style first and self-awareness helps with that foundation.

But next, I would urge people to look at a professionally developed 360 survey. And there are many of these available as well, as you would see via Google. But the folks at BCWI have an excellent program that is particularly well suited for the Christian leader, with a focus on character and competence and chemistry. And what I really like about the BCWI approach is its focus on spiritual vitality and spiritual leadership. And like the leadership-style survey, I always suggest that 360 be guided by a professional rather than try to pull something down off the Internet and do it ourselves. And the BCWI approach certainly reflects that. I'm a big fan of DIY projects, but this is just not an area in which the typical leader is ideally suited to go it alone. After all, we know that one of our biggest obstacles to self-awareness in general is that our own bias is so powerful.

We're familiar with the Johari’s window exercise, where we all have areas of leadership that can be blind spots, areas where we don't know what we don't know. But by using valid, reliable, and fair assessments, we can identify those blind spots and become more self-aware. And, you know, there's just too much at stake in terms of recognizing and investing in our leaders to take that all on without some sort of assessment. And I really find the leadership style and a 360 combination is the ideal way to go.

Al: I trust you’re enjoying our podcast today. We’ll be right back after an important word for leaders.

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Al: And now, back to today’s special guest.

That’s just great, Doug. And I'm just even reflecting on my own career. I remember doing a 360 myself midway through my career, now 30 years ago, probably. But how that was so helpful to me to understand how I was being perceived by my boss, by my peers, by those that were working for me on different projects. You know, sometimes we're surprised about what other people think about us when we go through 360 leadership-review processes that you're mentioning. You know, we're doing a couple hundred of these every year with our ministry and mission partners. So how do you help people understand their results? You know, when they get a 360, you know, what processes do you use so leaders can discover and act on the layers of their style, and impact the way they're influencing others that they're working with?

Doug: Yes, for sure. There can be surprises along the way in that process, and I think that potential to be surprised can discourage us at times from going through such a process to begin with. But I like to remind people, going back to the Johari’s window exercise, not all of those surprises are negative.

Al: Right.

Doug: They are often, very often, hidden strengths that we discover in the process, things about how we lead others that they recognize as helpful and effective that we don't know yet about ourselves. And the 360 review gets at those, uncovering some of the hidden treasure that we've been talking about. So when I talk with leaders about the results, I find it helpful to structure the conversation around the two perspectives of self-awareness that I've sort of mentioned already, internal and external.

So internal self-awareness is what we understand about ourselves, and this would be reflected by our self-ratings on a 360. And that's easy enough to see, and we should recognize that these are impacted by bias, of course, as we all struggle to search and know who we are, as we've talked about already. But the other half of this, and this is really the main benefit of 360, is that eternal, or I'm sorry, external perspective, but that is, are we aware of how others view our leadership characteristics? That perspective is reflected in the ratings that are provided by direct reports and peers and superiors and so on. And by understanding how 360 results reflect those two perspectives, we can begin to appreciate why any differences or gaps may exist. And the external perspective really gets at how others perceive the manner in which we use our leadership style and our skills to exercise influence. With an effective tool or process in place, we really want to encourage what I would call a pattern or reflection or routine of reflection; that is, a routine or a rhythm to gathering feedback. And through the support of a coach, being able to recognize strengths and sharpening those that are focused on our particular work environment, and then having the ongoing coaching to develop strengths for what may be needed next. And in that way, we're building and modeling self-leadership and preparing to serve where God has called us.

In terms of understanding what to do with the results practically, I look at it in a similar way to how I train as a runner. But I guess to be more self-aware, I should say I'm not a runner; I'm a person who runs. Real runners would be offended if they saw my mile times. But I try to run about five miles a day, five days a week, and I can get into a pattern where that's not such a big deal. But then circumstances change, such as the summer heat and humidity where I live. And when those circumstances change, I need to adjust a little bit. After all, the heat index can get over 100 here during the summer, and we can get thunderstorms that pop up quickly. So I need to understand the conditions internally and externally, and respond accordingly. So if I'm left to my own style, though, with my own internal bias perspective, I would probably tend to press on and ignore much of the warning signs regarding those conditions that I run. After all, my assumption is that my internal awareness, how I feel, is sufficient to inform my running. But pushing myself in that kind of heat or trying to outrun a thunderstorm when I'm still a couple of miles away from home is just a bad idea.

So I look to external perspective. I look to tools such as my watch. I've got one made by Garmin. I absolutely love it. This watch keeps track of my pace, as most running watches do, but it also monitors my heart rate and the heat and the upcoming weather. This thing is continually assessing for me what is happening, and it's got objective information from an external lens. It gives me layers of data, to your point. And I, then, adjust. I slow down if my heart rate gets too high, or I change my route if a storm is approaching. You know, generally the watch gives me corrective information that I really, really need. And without it, I would perform much less effectively. In fact, you could argue I would be in danger without it. More than once, on a summer afternoon, I must admit, that watch has sounded a little alarm, telling me my heart rate was too high, and then I slow down. But, you know, the interesting thing was I didn't feel any concern otherwise. I had no idea. I was just out for a run. So in that way, the watch has saved me when my internal awareness did not match the external reality.

So the bottom line here is don't go it alone. Look for opportunities to adjust, to calibrate, based on some external feedback. I mentioned earlier that without self-awareness there is no growth, that quote that was shared with me. We might add to that preface by saying, without an external perspective or lens, there really is no self-awareness, either.

Al: I love the watch analogy, Doug. That's great. And how we need input from those around us. And again, you mentioned the First Peter 5 quote where we're to shepherd the flock that God has given to us, and well, we need feedback in order to do that as to how they're receiving our leadership. You know, it's easy to see how this discovery process, you know, we're talking about 360s, how it's important for an emergent leader. And, you know, what about for senior leaders as well? Why would they want to continue doing 360 leadership reviews as they progress in their careers? Is self-awareness and self-leadership a destination, or do we need to keep doing this on the journey over a period of time? And we're often asked the question, you know, how often do we engage in a 360, for example? What advice do you have for us?

Doug: Yeah. That's the question that many senior leaders ask, and for far too many, their answer is, “Well, I did it once. I don't really need to continue with that.”

Al: Yeah.

Doug: We know our leadership style, how to use it, and it works for us. That's the typical conclusion.

Al: Mm-hmm.

Doug: It may be helpful, though, to ask another question. Like, how do you know your style does, in fact, work for you or for your team? The problem with that mindset is that it fails to recognize what you just alluded to in your question, and that is, you know, leadership itself is about influencing people, and if leaders influence people to go from one destination to another destination, then the whole point of leadership itself is about some form of journey. For leaders, the stakes are higher than ever as they move into more senior roles, and we would all agree with that. And although in theory a senior leader should have access to the most-effective development resources, the fact is they do not tend to seek those out. Often, they might blame the tyranny of the urgent, and such a self-awareness focus would be seen as a distraction from the “real” work that needs to be done. And as a result, in the highest-stakes’-type roles, we often find senior leaders who are not very self-aware, which means there is an increasing gap between how they view their leadership and how their leadership is actually impacting those around them, the flock. Although we talked about hidden strengths earlier, and those certainly exist, we often find that for the most senior leaders, the gaps tend to suggest the blind spots, the kind of gaps that can derail even the most effective strategic plan and leave a debris field of poor stewardship behind them.

I really appreciate BCWI’s cycle of discover, build, grow in this context. It's circular rather than linear, meaning that we build practices and take action based on what we discover. And then we grow over time by refining those practices and learning from experience. And then the cycle repeats, and we're on to discovery again. It's iterative. If we feel like self-awareness is a destination, we will limit our growth. We will stagnate in leadership. Self-awareness is also iterative.

Now, I’m from the Tampa Bay area. And so we're very familiar here with Tom Brady and his success on the football field the last couple of years, as are most football fans, long before he arrived in Tampa. As many rings as he has, Brady is known, even today, for his intense work ethic. It's still mentioned on the nightly news at times here. Now, if ever there was an athlete who could justify that he had arrived in his position, it would be Tom Brady. And yet, by all accounts, he gets to work early, stays late, studies film, works out, goes to an intense routine, watches what he eats, all those types of things to continually refine his craft. There's no destination in self-leadership or self-awareness. It's all a journey. The really great ones know that, and they model that for others.

Al: Great examples, Doug. You know, I love it's a journey; it's not a destination. You know, and as I think about, you even mentioned, you know, what is leadership? It's taking a people, a group of people from here to there. And that when they indicate, well, there's the beginning of the journey, the middle of the journey, the end of the journey, those are different places. And so using different leadership styles and knowing how your leadership style is being effective in each of those places is as important. Yeah. So self-awareness is iterative, and it's never stagnant.

It's great to hear how growth and self-awareness can help a person and an organization thrive and fulfill their mission. And of course, that's what we're all interested in learning how to do more of. Well, maybe there's someone listening who doesn't think they need any help in self-awareness. They seem to maybe get along well with their team. They feel like things are going just fine. They don't feel like they're a person who negatively impacts others. What would you say to them?

Doug: Wow. Well, I guess I'd say first to that person, and gently, please don't aspire to additional leadership responsibilities.

Al: Okay.

Doug: The failure to value self-awareness shows weakness in that foundational skill that I mentioned from the article I just read. And today's dynamic, collaborative workplace simply won't accept that. I've had the opportunity to consult and coach with CEOs who thought they were getting along just fine until they weren't. Often, they insulate themselves from any contrary opinion that would challenge what they think leadership should be. And oftentimes, it's someone who just drives hard and fast to get results. The problem is that this lack of self-awareness may be covered, at least for a while, by their teams’ efforts to work around their leader, to excel despite the leadership. And they may be able to do that for a while. But ultimately, the old adage, you know, “people don't leave jobs; they leave managers” comes into play. And in today's workplace especially, we expect more from our leaders than one static style, whatever that happens to be. As you mentioned, at each stage of the journey, different styles tend to be more needed. It's important to be able to operate within a range of those. And we expect agility from our leaders and their organizations, and you just can't get there without real timely information, and that includes self-awareness.

When I do workshops on emotional intelligence and teambuilding, I often use an exercise involving Legos. So I buy these small Lego sets, like ten bucks, where all the bricks you need to build, say, a race car or a plane or a boat or whatever, are included in this little box. And there's a picture of the thing you're supposed to build on the box, and there are detailed instructions inside. And the instructions include an inventory of the different Lego bricks that come with the set, you know, different shapes, sizes, color, etc. So just to make it interesting, I'll divide the participants into teams, and I will provide them with just a bag of bricks and a picture of the item they're supposed to build. I'll give them about 10 minutes to build the item, and I'll require that they use all the bricks, so nothing can be left over. When I say go, it's fascinating just how many teams will dive in and start building right away, quickly making progress, but they'll falter after a few minutes. Most often, they'll build something like what's pictured but not exactly. Or they'll get really close and they’ll have pieces left over at the end, and they'll just stick them quickly somewhere as the time runs out. The teams that seem to finish the task and build the item as envisioned are those that begin by taking inventory. They almost always will take the Legos out of the bag, sort them by size and shape and color, and then they will talk about what they're seeing and what they expect to see as the outcome. Then they'll begin to work through the building process and will try to be matching up those pieces as they go with the picture. They've got a vision for where they're going. They all started with some sense of inventory or awareness of what they were working with.

For far too many leaders, self-awareness seems unnecessary and too time consuming when there's work to be done, something to be built with urgency. After all, they have a clear picture in their mind of what they want to build or accomplish, and they just start leading. The result, though, can be a lot of wasted time and a lot of frustration.

And from a practical standpoint, I'd say one more thing to someone not interested in becoming more self-aware. Last year I presented a study at a conference, and in that study, we looked at over a thousand 360 feedback observations. Within that study, less than half of the self-rating is from leaders matched up with the ratings provided by their direct reports. So more than half were at least partially wrong in terms of how they perceived their own leadership impacting their teams. The gap between the self-ratings and the ratings of others actually grew if the leader and employee did not share the same preferred style. So taking inventory of what makes us the type or style of leader we are is incredibly important if we hope to build something meaningful in and through our teams. And opening ourselves up to such an inventory does not mean our leadership may be challenged somehow. We're actually more apt to be challenged if we don't have a clear, accurate understanding of where we are now and where we're going.

Al: I love that, Doug. You know, let's build something meaningful out of the work we're doing. And Christian-led organizations has an internal, eternal outcome. There's no question about it. So let's build something meaningful, and let's take inventory then in order to make sure that we finish the task, as you describe, in that great example.

Well, this has been a great conversation, Doug. I've just really appreciated our conversation on self-awareness. Kind of starting off with scripture, and we are God's handiwork and prepared in advance for doing good work. And the steps that you recommend, we should be searching ourselves as God searches us and knows us. Your comment reminds me of a pastor was saying, his assistant was saying, “Well, just speak from your heart, pastor.” And the pastor said, “Well, the heart is deceitful. I need notes.” But we need to be searched and known, and we need to start on that process ourself. And then also to look for external perspectives, because our self-awareness really depends on how we're being perceived by others. And to get feedback from others, just that's really critical. And I like your approach, you know, to help with self-awareness, the tool, are we a relator? Are we achiever? You know, how do we relate with others? How do we achieve the tasks that we're assigned to? And really be able to adapt our approach to multiple ways of meeting the task. Self-awareness is just so foundational. This has been a great discussion. Yeah. Again, we talked about the importance of 360s as a great way to get feedback.

How about, Doug? Is there anything you'd like to add that we haven't talked about?

Doug: Yeah. I think it's helpful to sort of end where we began, and I think it's important to ask ourselves why we are in leadership to begin with. And if that answer in any way touches on serving others, and it certainly should, then it's essential that we understand how our leadership is shaped and how that impacts those under our influence. Studies show that self-awareness within a leader means more empathy, better relationships, greater authenticity, and, yes, better performance. Ironically, though, as we've talked about, leaders often want to skip over this in pursuit of the better performance. And yet this should be step one, taking inventory of those Legos before we build.

And I'll say one more thing. We started off today talking about framing self-awareness for the Christian leader. And this is a topic that carries pretty serious implications, and it's very near and dear to my heart and a big part of why I’m in the career I’m in. To really get after it, we should frame self-awareness from a much deeper, more theological perspective. And to that point, there was a theologian named John Calvin who wrote about this centuries ago, and he said, “Without knowledge of self, there is no knowledge of God.” And he went on to say something like, “All true, solid wisdom consists almost entirely of two parts: that knowledge of God and the knowledge of ourselves. And it's not easy to determine which of the two proceeds.” I think he uses the term, gives birth to the other. And Calvin also said that “We never attain to a true self-knowledge, or self-awareness, until we have contemplated the face of God and come down after such contemplation to look at ourselves.” And I remember reading something about contemplating the face of God in a wonderful new book. I think you know what I'm talking about.

Al: I do.

Doug: So let me finish with this. As we contemplate the face of God, we see just how glorious and gracious and intentional He is and how filthy and frail and insignificant we are. And that is what Calvin was talking about. When we see ourselves in light of who God is, His character, His Holiness, we come away changed. The better we understand the gap, the chasm that would separate Him from us, the more we appreciate our need for the salvation He offers, and the more we yield our goals and submit our aspirations to His will, especially as leaders. And by His Spirit, He will work through us to accomplish His purposes, and they are good. And as leaders, we're simply stewards of His craftsmanship and of His treasure.

Al: Amen, Doug. Gosh, thanks so much for your contributions today. I appreciate the way you've set an example for stewarding your own abilities from your foundation of Christian faith. Your work helps so many other leaders grow in their effectiveness as well, and we're seeing that over and over again here at Best Christian Workplaces. These self-aware leaders that you're talking about are making a difference for the Kingdom of God. Thanks for taking time out of your day and speaking into the lives of so many listeners.

Doug: It has been an honor, and I always look forward to chatting with you, Al.

Al: Yeah. Thanks, Doug.

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